Marilyn: I hope this reply will be of some help.
My name is Jim Cressman and I host the Military Veterans with Myositis Affinity Group. I, too, am a disabled veteran from the Vietnam war.
There is a tremendous program available from the VA to caregivers, such as yourself and your husband. It is called the Program of Comprehensive Assistance for Family Caregivers or PCAFC.
My wife and I applied for it and were provided a substantial monthly allowance for whatever expense we needed to cover.
Here is the website address: You may want to copy and paste it to get to this website.
https://www.va.gov/family-member-benefits/comprehensive-assistance-for-family-caregivers/

Additionally – There is a regular monthly zoom meeting for Veterans, Spouses and Caregivers that is the best source of information for Veterans with myositis – anywhere in the U.S. We would love to see you there – – I promise – It will be helpful. Best of Luck – Jim.